Monday, March 28, 2005
born in a family with a stupid idiotic brother..damn idiotic brother.. hate him so much!! he owes me too much yet still dare to open his evil mouth... idiot!! hate him to the core...
pfft* how depressing life can be at times...
today, i went to church... i didn't expect myself to hand out the newsletter at all.. but i sure did and i gave some to my cg.. what happens? people just walked out and chuck the newsletter aside.. to think i took so much time and pain to do that.. worse, its my newsletter... many disappointments today... people refuse to even take a look at it... there's too many people doing support raising in church this year and i'm horribly stressed about it.. even to a point of breakdown~ i can't imagine myself going through tougher support raising than last year.. it was excruciating!!
so, at times, i leave myself in doubts of inadequacy and impossibility.. at times, God reassure me that He will provide... but of course, yes, i didn't raise the full amount last year. not to mention half of it. people thought i did but i did not.. imagine this year... i don't even think i'll raise a quarter of it. how sad can that be...
yeah.. emotions are taking over... why not? probably need some time to get over it.. really, its hard though....
talking to my team mates can be so fun... first, i was thinking, since andy is not staying put in a church yet, might as well ask him to my church for a visit and to support me.. its good to have some team members to support you during this crucial time... and he suggest if we could all go to each other's church every week.. i told him that by the time we finish visiting, we would have come back from japan... and then, immediately, i asked sandra what does she think of the idea? she said yes, why not? and then we involved vincent in our chat... and then, andy and i kinda agreed on vincent and albert's church this sunday... and of course.. the story goes on...
hmm.. i'm starting to like sandra more~ hehe!! she's so nice and sweet!! thank you for all your encouragement dear...
though vincent, the old man might not be reading this, but i want to thank him for the last 2 sentence he wrote before he left the chat... yar.. encouraging.. really...
love them and miss my old team mates... wonder when are we going to dine out again?!
liten shan@
12:41 AM
