Tuesday, September 28, 2004
just don't know what to say...
met up with mister leng to get some photos from him... we got some ice cream by the road and he was going “?????” and i was like thinking... hmm... i don't remember we had a ?? with that kinda experience... i only remember eating expensive ice creams with his and pris and i always had to say... "i am broke!" haha!!
anyway, just looked at the pictures and hmm... had some funny ideas going around and round in my head. nostalgic? no. its absolutely silly...
then read yahui's testimonial to me... she said i am always "mia" ing... hmm... i really have to think about that! and i saw josh's friendster and he is now attached!! wow!! that nerd... and ling ling, jiajia, peifen and janice has grown prettier... they seemed to be happy with their new found life... well, i guess they have been growing and maturing... and me? i am still stuck in ground zero... nothing!
maybe... its time to grow... sigh!
then... i am really thinking... how miserable i can really be...
and then again... dad has been quite discouraging and i felt so small... again!
if i knew...
if i say...
will things ever change back again?
if i see...
if i cry...
where will i go once again...
oh its not that i have
that kind of faith i used to be...
and its not like i am
what i have really been used to be...
if i feel...
and i cannot feel...
the past that pulls me back...
if i know...
if i do...
will the truth brings me back?
oh its not like i know...
all the things He has planned...
its begins and it ends...
all the time i never fends...
someone once said i should write more lyrics in chinese... someone wrote a song for her... and that inspire me to write as freely as i can... thank you! her's friend.
liten shan@
3:32 AM