Thursday, April 29, 2004
don't know whether it hurts or not...
i was just thinking about my past and present... my secondary schoolmates... kinda hurting... i was so good with them... in the end... none of them stayed... there goes for my poly schoolmates too...
i was just looking through friendster where i saw dane... he kinda changed a bit... don't really know him... but wonder how is he doing... anyways... thinking about him reminds me of my classmates... really!! what have i done to myself? i really don't know...
i feel so empty... after so many years of pursuit of friends and stuffs... realised that... there is only one person who is with me whether rain or shine... and i am so glad that i have a friend like her... who likes to eat sharkfin's... haha... you might have guessed it...
so! in the end... even i have to face darkness or loneliness... at least i have Jesus in me...
but who would have guessed... i am still depressed... i really don't mean it... yet, i cannot say,"go away!!" and live in denial... its not working at all...
and who would have been there? i don't know... seems like burying myself in the world of chinese rpg games doesn't work eh? but somehow, its effect is far better than words...
i admit... i have a depressing blog...
probably i should start thinking on how to speak to people...
even talking to my closest friends, i have difficulty talking...
that's why i crap more often... haha...
jabez once said that the reason i was to become an xa was because i could socialise with people and talk to them... yet in actual fact... i am the only one who cannot talk as much as they thought of... the reason why the whole idea of connecting with people could last was because... i crap and do more than i really talk to them... so much for an extrovert eh?
in actual fact... i am an introvert... that's why... i am a high D and high I...
darn... my chinese rpg game is spoilt... sigh~
liten shan@
4:27 AM