Sunday, February 22, 2004
just moody...
mood swings are common for me... although, everyone thought i am upset over shiqi's wedding... but the fact is not... i am really trying to sort myself out...
days passed... i still cannot get hold of myself... at a point... there seems to be no light creeping through chinks in my room... its all darkness... my world is dark...
everynight, i'll just pop my head of my kitchen windown and look over to the other blocks and the cars lined up neatly in the car park... no movement except nature's breeze... or probably people walking pass... then i look up the sky... i wonder... why do i despise the view taken from the back of my block and yearns for those in front... suddenly, it came to me... its the same... wherever it is... where is front and where is back... no one knows... night tiime is the only time i can be alive... i love the sound of the compressor... the quietness surrounded by the noisiest things during daytime... and the back view always reminds me of the time when i was still in kuala lumpur... i believe that one day... i'll go back there...
just finished watching a vcd on primary school by domoto tsuyoshi... i love his act... the show reminds me that i've aged... my body has grown... but mind is still like a child...
so... the trip to nagoya still hasn't spurs me... because... i am losing faith even before the battle starts...
liten shan@
4:55 AM
